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  • Writer's pictureLouie Monteith


(1 Peter 2:4) . . . chosen by God and precious.

There is no job that can ever compare to being a pastor’s wife. It is one of the most challenging positions any woman could ever hold. But you are chosen by God for it and you are precious because of your special calling and all you do for your husband and the flock. But as you walk side by side with him in serving God, you will have to keep a few things in mind.

THICK SKIN: To survive in the ministry, it is essential to have a thick skin and not take anything people say or do personally. This is going to be tough for you because you are a woman and are sensitive and you love and adore your family. But sheep will be sheep and they can be baaaad! They will gossip and talk about your hubby and your sweet children. Satan will try to get a barb under your skin through this, but don’t let him pull you into an arena where you’ll be fighting mad! Keep your cool and give it to God. There will always be problems and problem people in the church. Get used to it. Remember you are called and God will give you the grace to not keep a file cabinet of grievances in your memory bank. (2 Cor 2:11) lest Satan should take advantage of us; for we are not ignorant of his devices.

PRIORITIES: Your husband and family are your number one priority. Don’t get so involved in the church that you neglect your husband’s or your children’s needs. You will be tempted to do everything because there are so many needs in the church, or others may place expectations on you, or you might have a few for yourself. Enjoy your involvement, but be ready to back out of some things when you feel the weight is just too much. Pray for someone to take over a few of your responsibilities so you may focus on just a few things and do them well. Maintain a freshness for your family so they will feel they have the best part of you. When your kids are young you will be limited in what you can do. But when they are older and you feel freer with your time, you can take on weightier responsibilities. And remember your number one priority is your relationship with God and maintaining a quality devotional life. (Luke 10:38-42)

DO YOUR WORK FOR CHRIST: There are so many things a pastor’s wife does behind the scenes for the ministry that no one will ever know. She fills in so many details and her list is always growing. Do all things for the Lord so you will never resent it when people fail to take notice. (Mat 6:4) that your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly.

NOTE TO THE PASTOR: Remember the church hired you and not your wife. Keep an eye on her work intensity and praise her constantly. (Pro 31:28-29)

NOTE TO CHURCH: As you pray and support your pastor, do the same for your pastor’s wife. Let her know she is appreciated. Happy pastor’s wife means a happy pastor and happy sheep!



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